Are You Contributing to Your Partner’s Emotional Abuse?

Understanding your relationship requires taking a closer look at daily interaction with your partner and the way you feel about it. This quiz will help you recognize behaviors that indicate serious trouble in your relationship that may be improved with therapy. (Your test results are not stored to maintain confidentiality.)

Start the quiz

1. Do you tolerate, downplay, or ignore your partner’s abusive treatment or behavior?

2. Do you make excuses for your partner’s bad behavior?

3. Are you quick to defend your partner or your relationship when family members and friends express their concern about the way your partner treats you?

4. Are you confused about whether or not you are the cause of the problems in your relationship?

5. Do you take the blame for issues in your relationship even though you feel you are not to blame?

6. Do you constantly think about how to please your partner?

7. Do you go to extremes to gain your partner’s approval, even though your partner doesn’t seem to appreciate your efforts?

8. Do you stay awake at night wondering where your partner is, or waiting for them to get home?

9. Do you refrain from expressing your feelings when your partner’s behavior upsets you?

10. Do you give in to your partner to prevent a fight?

11. Do you have sex with your partner to prevent a fight?

12. Do you allow your partner to coerce you into sex acts that hurt or humiliate you?

13. Do you believe if you make fundamental changes in your character traits or looks, your partner will love you, or you will be worthy of your partner’s love?

14. Do you try to please your partner by going against your own values and beliefs or behaving in ways that are destructive to yourself or other people?

15. Do you use drugs, alcohol, gambling, food, excessive spending, or any other obsessive activity to escape from painful feelings about your relationship?

16. Have you given up your hopes, dreams, or aspirations against your will since you have been in your current relationship?

17. Do you retaliate against your partner by using some of the same abusive tactics they use on you?

18. Do you wish your partner would physically harm you so you would have evidence of their abusive treatment of you?

19. Do you tolerate your partner’s cheating on you and refusing to get professional help?

20. Do you tolerate your partner’s lies?

21. Do you tolerate your partner’s lack of availability for you and your children?

22. If your partner abuses your children, do you tolerate the abuse?

23. Do you act as if everything is okay in your relationship when you’re hurting inside?

24. Do you isolate yourself from friends or family members who know you have a difficult relationship?

25. Have you decided to stay in an abusive relationship because you fear you can’t make it on your own?

26. Have you accepted your abusive relationship as your fate and given up on trying to improve your life situation?

27. Do you find yourself going from one difficult relationship to another?

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Are You Contributing to Your Partner’s Emotional Abuse?

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If you answered yes to more than a few questions in this quiz and the yes feelings or behaviors occur regularly, you could be in an emotionally abusive relationship. It is vital for you to get the appropriate emotional support and guidance.

If you're interested in booking a video therapy session, send an email describing your situation, your objective for therapy, and where you’re located through the contact form on this site. My practice is devoted to providing therapy for adults experiencing emotional abuse. If you have questions about emotional abuse but are not seeking therapy, you can find other resources. Please understand that I cannot have conversations or answer questions online without a professional agreement. This is due to a variety of professional and ethical reasons. Thank you.

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Are You Contributing to Your Partner’s Emotional Abuse?

Understanding your relationship requires taking a closer look at daily interaction with your partner and the way you feel about it. This quiz will help you recognize behaviors that indicate serious trouble in your relationship that may be improved with therapy. (Your test results are not stored to maintain confidentiality.)

Start the quiz


1. Do you tolerate, downplay, or ignore your partner’s abusive treatment or behavior?


2. Do you make excuses for your partner’s bad behavior?


3. Are you quick to defend your partner or your relationship when family members and friends express their concern about the way your partner treats you?


4. Are you confused about whether or not you are the cause of the problems in your relationship?


5. Do you take the blame for issues in your relationship even though you feel you are not to blame?


6. Do you constantly think about how to please your partner?


7. Do you go to extremes to gain your partner’s approval, even though your partner doesn’t seem to appreciate your efforts?


8. Do you stay awake at night wondering where your partner is, or waiting for them to get home?


9. Do you refrain from expressing your feelings when your partner’s behavior upsets you?


10. Do you give in to your partner to prevent a fight?


11. Do you have sex with your partner to prevent a fight?


12. Do you allow your partner to coerce you into sex acts that hurt or humiliate you?


13. Do you believe if you make fundamental changes in your character traits or looks, your partner will love you, or you will be worthy of your partner’s love?


14. Do you try to please your partner by going against your own values and beliefs or behaving in ways that are destructive to yourself or other people?


15. Do you use drugs, alcohol, gambling, food, excessive spending, or any other obsessive activity to escape from painful feelings about your relationship?


16. Have you given up your hopes, dreams, or aspirations against your will since you have been in your current relationship?


17. Do you retaliate against your partner by using some of the same abusive tactics they use on you?


18. Do you wish your partner would physically harm you so you would have evidence of their abusive treatment of you?


19. Do you tolerate your partner’s cheating on you and refusing to get professional help?


20. Do you tolerate your partner’s lies?


21. Do you tolerate your partner’s lack of availability for you and your children?


22. If your partner abuses your children, do you tolerate the abuse?


23. Do you act as if everything is okay in your relationship when you’re hurting inside?


24. Do you isolate yourself from friends or family members who know you have a difficult relationship?


25. Have you decided to stay in an abusive relationship because you fear you can’t make it on your own?


26. Have you accepted your abusive relationship as your fate and given up on trying to improve your life situation?


27. Do you find yourself going from one difficult relationship to another?


Enter your email to see your results

Incorrect email address.
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